Hihihihi!! I’m alive & seeing that I am no longer a resident of Claremont, here are five random things that’ll happen to you when you leave!
(1) NO MORE EARLY MORNING TRAIN NOISES
You ain’t gotta listen to that GOD DAMN train blasting its horn at 7am no more! This is especially for my Pomona folks (sorry y’all poor south campus dwellers. I’m looking directly at you Wig and Lyon. Your time will soon come to migrate up to north campus, but rest assured, you will still hear that god forsaken train horn even if you’re cozy in Sontag and whatever the hell they are now calling Pomona Hall). Those suites ain’t gonna save you!!
(2) SAY BYE BYE TO THE OMELETTE LINE
I dunno about y’all but when it comes to brunch, my suite and I did not play any games. If you wanted a chance at an omelette in Frank, you had better wake up with the train horn and start doing your homework (#sundayfundayamirite?), so that by 10:30am, you and your crew were out the door! When I finally #upgraded to the north, Frary tried to play games with me. You see, they have this thing called “continental breakfast”, which isn’t really breakfast at all and I FINALLY REALIZED IT WAS ALL A DECOY! Instead of swiping in at 10:30am when brunch actually started, some of y’all wretched souls would swipe in for “continental” only so you could get in that omelette line first. Yes, I saw you and yes, I was the girl who gave you the ultimate side eye.
(3) LONG DISTANCE FRIENDSHIPS
I promise you this is going to be the face you make when you’re finally able to coordinate a skype session amongst your friends (who now reside in different parts of the world/country with different time zones) and everyone was actually able to make it! Followed immediately by:
Serve yourself a cup of tea because post-grad gossip sessions are even more juicer.
(4) YOU MEET BAE(S)
And bae has good brows. Good for bae.
(5) YOU CAN’T FLEX NO MORE
Rent prices are crazy & corporations are stingy & taxes are real so yup, you’re going to be just a tad strapped at any given time. Flex all the Flex you got in your account for now, cuz when it’s gone, se fue!